Essay On My Parents My Pride Card

Hope all of you enjoyed your holidays and had a wonderful New Year. Now that we are finally in 2012, I am back with my writing after my short break with my wonderful dad, just as I had mentioned in my last post about my wish list and resolutions!

It was indeed a pleasure to have my father visit us for New Years as it always is, and today’s post is all about my father, who really is my pride- and everything that I have learnt from him. In fact, it would be apt if I call this post as “Lessons from my father.”

I have often noticed that people write about their loved ones or parents after their demise or after having lost them. But I wanted my dad to know how I felt about him and what he means to me, not after he is gone- instead right now- in the present.

“Any man can be a father.  It takes someone special to be a dad.”  ~Author Unknown

Brief Introduction

My father’s name is Maj. Gen. (Dr.) Kulwant. Singh, UYSM (Uttam Yudh Sewa Medal) and he retired from the Indian Army after having won many accolades. Not to mention having fought the two Indo-Pak wars in 1965 and 1971, and having led the IPKF in Sri Lanka.

He tackled terrorism and insurgency in and out of the country, by playing a major part in planning and execution at higher levels, and received one of the highest gallantry awards of India for his services.

Having our father in the army at such a high ranking post was always a privilege my sister and I enjoyed when we were kids, and it was always an honor to be known as his daughter. We cherished living in lavish houses, travelling in the best of vehicles, having the best of facilities, and lots of working staff at home.

My father was born on 10th September 1939 in Khomari that is now a part of Pakistan, but after India’s partition in 1947, my grandfather, who was also in the army, decided to shift to India. Theirs was a large family of many brothers and sisters, so I was indeed blessed to have many aunts, uncles, and cousins.

It was after my father’s retirement that my mother passed away fighting cancer, which was indeed heart-breaking for my father- as they were a much-in-love couple and truly made for each other.

After his retirement from the army and the loss of my mother, my father was destined to join the Maharishi University as their Vice Chancellor. His global appointments with the Maharishi World Organization include being the Defense Minister of Global Country of World Peace, and the Director General of Invincible Defense.

In brief, for me a dad is someone who

  • is a daughter’s first love
  • will be there for you no matter how bad a mistake you’ve made
  • will stand up for you when you need him
  • will give you their hugs and shoulders to cry on
  • promises you that you will always be his little girl
  • walks you down the aisle and tells you everything is gonna be Ok!
  • loves you so much and will sacrifice whatever it is to make you happy again

I hope you won’t mind the length of today’s post, as there is a lot that I have learnt from my father that I want to share with everyone!

1- Discipline

This comes naturally to us as being born and brought up in an army background; everything has to be on time! Self-discipline is so important for everyone and something that my dad truly believes in.

He has always been a disciplined man where his daily routine is concerned. I remember when he was in the army; there was never a single day I had seen him stay at home or leave late for work. Even now when he is nearly 75, he never misses his timely schedule of walking, exercising, playing golf, meditating, praying, reading, being with all of us, and going out for other work.

I am indeed proud to follow in his footsteps where discipline is concerned, and try my best to instill this important value in my kids as well.

2- Sharing and caring

I have a younger sister who is also an accomplished author, having just finished her first novel. So, being just two sisters- we did have our share of fights, ups-and-downs, the good and bad times. But our parents always taught us to share things and care for each other- no matter what.

For us, charity always began from home and the joy of giving was something that I picked up from my parents. My father is very liberal and donates so much to various institutions, to the under privileged, and gives without hesitation or second thoughts to the poor.

My father always taught me to learn to give, care for people and share a part of what you have with others. This is a very important lesson passed on to my kids, as I also have two daughters- and it all comes back to what I had learnt from my father long back.

3- Far sighted and wise

My father has always been very wise and thought well ahead of time, catered for things, and been well prepared for any kind of emergencies in life. Though we keep telling him to refrain from thinking much, or getting tensed, but old habits die hard!

Of course, there are times when everything we want and plan cannot be accomplished, but he has that wisdom and far-sightedness which is something I learnt from him as well.

To think wisely and in advance, plan things out, think ahead of time, cater for rough times, and be prepared at all times are some of the things I learnt from him.

4- Positive attitude

My father has gone through a lot in his career, where there were ups and downs, good times and rough patches as well. But he always overcame all of them with a smiling face, and accepting things as His grace.

The loss of my mother was the worst thing that could have hit him, yet he stood his stand and put up a brave front for us. No matter what he may have been undergoing, he never let us know, nor expressed it openly – instead always had a positive attitude towards life.

The lesson learned was to fight all odds bravely and fearlessly. Learning to smile despite the consequences, learning to accept, adapt, and adjust to situations, and overcoming your sorrows are major things I learnt from him.

5- Alert and responsible

I marvel at his memory, alertness, and responsibility even at this age! My father has always been a very alert, aware, responsible father and person. I remember the time when we were kids and if there was anything that needed attention, there was immediate action taken with no further delay.

He has been a doting and adorable father. Whenever there have been low moments in our lives, we have always turned to him for guidance and help. And he has always been there for us like our pillar of strength, without knowing how much he motivates, inspires, and gives us.

I have learnt from my father to be more aware, alert, responsible, and a good parent. Of course my mother played a great role, but I speak of my dad who has been with us much longer than my mother.

6- Love

There has never been any shortage of love in our family, as there was abundance of it right from the time I remember. I recollect the time when I was just a baby- right up to now- my parents have always showered us with unconditional love and blessings right through.

My father and mother were best of friends and well known as a made-for-each-other couple, and lived up to it right till the time my mother passed away. I have seen their love for each other always grow stronger each passing day.

I remember the time when my mother was ailing and how my father tried his very best to do all he could to fight the cancer. He even went to the extent of learning Reiki and trying out various other means, just with the hope that something would work for her. It never did, but that was a lesson in disguise for us.

It is a well known fact that when you have so much love within you, it shows in all forms. Similarly, I have seen my father’s love for other people, the poor and underprivileged, and even our pets (we had pigeons, rabbits, fishes, and dogs when we were young!)

I learnt to love by seeing my parents love for each other, learnt to care for the poor and underprivileged, and of course my pet dog is a bundle of joy for our family.

7- Health and fitness

As far as I can remember I have always seen my dad participating in various sports, like golf that he plays daily without fail, and he has been a National level champion swimmer during his younger days. He is very regular with his walks, exercises, yoga, meditation, and other activities.

He is very concerned where his health and fitness is concerned, which is the reason he remains so active and fit even at this age!

My father always eats the right kind of food, something he keeps telling us to follow as well. I have always seen a bowl of fresh fruits and salads around him, and he is extra cautious when it comes to eating fried, sugary, or starchy food.

Lesson I have learnt is to eat at the right time, the right kind of food, accompanied with the right amount of exercise. Though I started late in life, but this is surely something I am going to follow and instill in my kids as well.

8- Prayers and faith

Keeping the faith and regular prayers has always been a vital part in our family. We have always had a special prayer room right from the day I remember, and I have seen my parents always praying regularly and never losing their faith in the Almighty.

There were some trying times in my dad’s career, and even when my mother was ailing- I have always seen my father praying and having the belief that everything will turn out well. He always believed that everything that occurs happens for a reason and we accept it as God’s grace.

I have often heard my father narrate how my grandmother prayed day and night when my dad was at war-front with bomb shells all around him. His tank was about to be blown off, but some force saved him. He truly believes it were his mother’s prayers that did the trick, as there was no way he would have survived otherwise.

I have learnt to pray daily in my small pray room, though as long as you pray the place doesn’t matter. And I try hard to not lose the faith and keep believing that everything will be well. Similarly, I try and pass on these values to my kids as well- though they have yet to start their regular prayers, as they have their own way of praying- so they say!

9- Enjoy life and live it to the fullest

The wonderful childhood memories spent with my parents is something I can never get back, nor forget. My father was a great planner of things, and always had a ready chalked out holiday schedule well before our vacations started!

He always believed to live each moment and life it to the fullest by enjoying your present. So, when we had our family holidays, we went visiting so many places that when I sit back and recollect, there is no place uncovered in our country!

There was always happiness in life, enjoyment, fun time, sight-seeing, shopping, partying, and lots of travelling when we went with dad. And all four of us were always ready to go anywhere, and anytime!

Lesson I learnt was to live life to the fullest and live each moment, as we can never say about tomorrow- whether it will be there or not. What exists is the present- the now, so enjoy it!

10- Family comes first

A very important lesson learnt early in life as I saw and lived with my parents was that family always comes first, no matter what the position, post, or work.

My parents have always been there for us kids and knew the importance of family time. Similarly, we are always there for my father now, and there are no ifs and buts about it.

Though my dad was very careful and cautious with his career and reputation, he never let it affect his family life. He always maintained a wonderful balance between work and his family. I guess he learnt the art of time-management very well!

I have learnt to balance work and family time to the best of my abilities, though I still need to work more on this aspect and lessen my work time so that I can spend more time with my family!

Well, I know my list is endless as I can’t really pen down everything my father has taught me within a few lines. But I hope this post will help you in some way to learn a few lessons, especially if you also have as loving a father as I do!

There are so many people I come across who have lost their loved ones and never had the chance to tell them how much they meant to them. So, reach out to your parents or loved ones and tell them how much they mean to you, and do it as soon as possible. Learn to forget and forgive by moving on and connecting.

I want to take this opportunity to express my love for my father by dedicating this post to him, and adding these few lines-

What Is A Dad?

A dad is someone who wants to catch you before you fall but instead picks you up, brushes you off, and lets you try again.

A dad is someone who wants to keep you from making mistakes but instead lets you find your own way, even though his heart breaks in silence when you get hurt.

A dad is someone who holds you when you cry, scolds you when you break the rules, shines with pride when you succeed, and has faith in you even when you fail… ~ Author Unknown

I also want to add that we value and treasure you a great deal dad, and you mean the world to us. Please take care of yourself for us by worrying less, and may God always bless you and give you a long- happy, and content life.

Thank you once again for taking out the time to read this post and, I apologize for the length of this post but I hope it was helpful for some, and that you would make an effort to reach out to your parents as well or remember them fondly if they are no longer with you.

Are there any unspoken words you would like to share about your parents? How do you connect with your father or mother? Share in the comments below.

About the author

Harleena Singh

Harleena Singh is a positive thinker and a freelance writer. She loves to write inspiring and thought provoking posts on self-improvement, family, relationships, health, and other aspects of life. She's also a blogger, who loves to share her blogging knowledge and experiences.

disciplinefamilyfatherlessons learntlovemy fathermy mothermy parentsmy sisterpositive attitudeprayers & faithsharing & caring

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It’s no secret that my parents had a HUGE impact on the person I am today. In fact, I’d say they were the biggest reason I’m so passionate about personal finance and development.

I remember walking around department stores with my mom when I was a kid and watching her negotiate for EVERYTHING. It didn’t matter if it was a new shirt for me or laundry detergent at the grocery store. She was always ready to throw down the gauntlet and haggle for a lower price.

My dad’s incredibly financially savvy as well — almost to a fault. He once dragged me along with him as he spent an entire week negotiating with a salesman for a lower price on a car. Here’s the kicker: As he was literally about to sign the papers for the car, he stopped, asked the salesman to throw in free floor mats, and walked away when they refused.

That’s an entire week’s worth of bargaining them down to an incredibly fair price, only to walk away when they didn’t throw in some floor mats he could have bought for less than 50 bucks at Walmart. I was wide-eyed and shell-shocked like I just went through three tours of duty in ‘Nam as we walked away from the dealership.

What’s my point? Two things:

  1. My mom and dad are incredibly Indian.
  2. Parents impact your life in more profound ways than you can ever imagine.

What’s the best thing YOU learned from your parents?

A while back, one of my students asked this amazing question — and I loved it so much that I wanted to throw it out to the entire IWT community.

She asked members of one of the IWT Facebook Groups what we’d learned from our parents and what we’re grateful for. My response is below.

The question got me thinking: What are some things my readers learned from their parents? So I asked you … and I got a TON of answers back.

I’d like to share 10 of the best ones I found with you today.

Parent lesson #1: Find a better band

Your father’s a wise man, Scott. He also echoed a few mantras that another wise man likes to harp on (i.e. me). Punching above your weight class is something I always talk about when it comes to negotiations — namely, the door-in-face technique when it comes to getting a better salary.

My favorite of his two pieces of advice, though, has to be “go find a better band.” We should always be surrounding ourselves with people with whom we can learn and grow. That’s why it’s so important to both work on your social skills and be willing to find someone who’ll mentor you.

Parent lesson #2: Sometimes the bad things can be good

After more than a decade of running IWT — which includes producing dozens of courses, hundreds of articles, and an email list of thousands — I’ve made my fair share of mistakes …

… okay, I’ve made a crap ton of mistakes (and still do too). One thing I can say about those mistakes though is that I’ve probably learned more about how to build a business from screwing up than I ever did from any book or article.

The best part is, those lessons stuck with me even more because of how bad some of the mistakes were.

It doesn’t matter if you’re getting out of debt, starting your own business, or saving money for something. You’ve got to learn to embrace your “fails” as hidden wins if you ever want to find success in life. After all, that’s when you’ll learn the most.

Parent lesson #3: Be honest no matter how brutal it might be

Yes, Khuram, I agree completely.

I actually believe there’s a great power in brutal honesty — especially when it’s directed towards yourself. After all, how many of us have things our friends AREN’T telling us?

Maybe you’re socially awkward? Maybe you’re not as good of a cook as your girlfriend is letting on? Are you always late and come up with a million excuses as to why?

What happens when nobody calls us out on these things is that we start to accept our position in life. We think, “This is who I am and nothing will change that.” This condition is called “learned helplessness” and is the root cause of mental barriers preventing many people from succeeding.

When we start being honest with ourselves, though, we can not only start focusing on what matters most but we can start saying no to the things that simply aren’t important to us.

Parent lesson #4: Stuff isn’t important

If you’ve been reading my blog for a while, there’s something that you’ve heard me mention before: Anyone can be rich.

That being said, being rich ISN’T all about money. It’s about what being rich means to YOU.

For me, being rich isn’t about the stuff you own or even the money you have. I’ve always believed in getting really good at something, then passing it on to others. That’s my version of being rich — and since so many of you are reading this, I’m an incredibly wealthy man.

A Rich Life is more than money. It starts by managing your own, and continues by helping OTHERS get rich.

Parent lesson #5: Learn from where we came up short

I love this idea of a “negative example” and it goes to showcase the important idea that you should always feel confident in striking out and finding a job you love — whether it’s in your dream job or by starting your very own business.

But I totally understand why that’s an incredibly scary thought. Being willing to dig your heels into the ground and say that you want to actively pursue something you’re passionate about goes against everything that society has taught us.

We’re supposed to get the degree, work the 9-to-5, and retire in our sixties to a condo in Florida. These are the invisible scripts we’ve had all of our lives. The trick is to recognize them for what they are though: absolute bullshit.

Parent lesson #6: Never underestimate the power of a thank you note

One hard truth to swallow is the fact that there are no hard and set rules for SO many things in life. For example: Building your own business. You can follow all the how-to guides out there, buy all the courses, read all the books, and you still might end up watching your hard work crash and burn.

BUT if you’re willing to go the extra mile and do the work that 99.999999% of people aren’t willing to do, you’re going to receive disproportionate rewards for it.

That’s why I love that you were taught never to “underestimate the power of a thank-you note.” It’s one of those small touches that can absolutely make or break situations like a job interview follow-up.

Parent lesson #7: Find value in delayed gratification

Rome wasn’t built in a day, and the same goes for your Rich Life. That’s why it’s so frustrating whenever I get an email from someone who says something to the effect of, “I started your course on freelancing a week ago and still haven’t gotten a single client! What gives?”

The value you get out of something is directly correlated with the amount of time it takes to get it. The bigger the win, the longer it’ll take. But if you’re willing to stick with it and take the time to really make sure you accomplish your goals correctly, I promise you you’ll see results.

Parent lesson #8: Imagine if you were smart …

I love Angela’s dad’s way of approaching situations. It’s exactly what I suggest to people if they want to get past the crippling barriers stopping them from accomplishing their goals.

After all, confidence comes from being successful at micro-steps. Let’s say you want to become more confident about public speaking. That comes with its own set of barriers:

  • What if I use the wrong word?
  • What if everyone laughs at me — or worse — doesn’t laugh at my jokes?
  • What if they all get bored?

Many times, that’s enough to screw up. It’s a self-fulfilling prophecy.

However, if you ask yourself, “What if I were the absolute master of this domain? What would I do?”

You certainly wouldn’t get overwhelmed by practicing your speech in front of family and friends. And you wouldn’t mind workshopping it with some people whose opinions you trust until you get all of the words right. You would just do what was necessary to become a better public speaker. It’s a fantastic technique to become more confident over time.

Parent lesson #9: Punctuality, courtesy of a German father

Sounds like your parents’ German side has served you well, Rebecca! Not many people can say their families gave them the ability to set concrete goals and put time on the calendar to get things done. Building solid habits like those are absolutely essential if you want to find success in life and your career.

I remember I used to be just AWFUL about finding time to just focus on developing myself and my company. That’s when I decided to actually schedule time in my calendar to just focus on strategy and research. That meant:

  • No meetings
  • No calls
  • No emails

And it worked wonders. Some of IWT’s best courses came from one of those “no” times, and is still one of my best habits.

Bonus: Want some more insights into building habits that’ll last? Download my Ultimate Guide to Habits and start achieving your goals today.

Parent lesson #10: “Take advantage of all the education”

If there’s one thing that I hope my readers have gained from my blog, it’s that you should always be in a state of curiosity. Be inquisitive. Ask questions when you don’t understand something and don’t be afraid to seek out more information through books, courses, or schooling.

Do you have a good lesson from your parents? Share it in the comments.

And if you want to learn actionable steps to put yourself well on the road to living a Rich Life, I have an offer for you: My Insider’s Kit.

Get my Insider’s Kit FREE to find out more tactics and scripts to teach you how to make money and get rich — without all of the BS and scams that you’d typically see online.

Sign up below. Looking forward to hearing from you.

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